Book Features

Sneak Peek of Expecting Sunshine by Alexis Marie Chute

Week 20: Horse with Blue Eyes

Pulling out of the garage one morning and turning onto the snowy road toward Mom’s house, it was as if I were piloted directly into a cloud. With less than a kilometer behind me, it was without doubt no ordinary winter morning. The new world was buttered with hoarfrost so thick its icicles dripped off branches like tiny rapiers, and everything, from the stark white horizon to the cloaked roadway, glowed in the diffused February light.
“Moon!” Hannah yelled from her car seat in the back, pointing at the misty orb low in the sky.

“That’s the sun, Han.”

“Moon!” Hannah called again, and I let myself see through her two-year-old eyes. It was in that moment that I relented to my own childlike curiosity. I dropped off Hannah with her grand-mother and, instead of heading back to the house to work, traced the back roads of south Edmonton that divided farmers’ fields and dense patches of trees, my camera bag sitting on the passenger seat beside me. “Frost chaser,” I called myself. I couldn’t remember the last time I had felt such unguarded anticipation—not since
early in my pregnancy with Zachary, at least. The thought made me shudder.
Hopping out of the car, I struggled to zip up my coat, but it would not stretch past my belly button. Finding a scarf in the backseat, I wrapped it around my neck and waded through a slop.

About The Book

Anyone who has experienced—or knows someone who has experienced—miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, stillbirth, or other forms of pregnancy and baby loss should read Expecting Sunshine, including those considering or already pregnant again.

After her son, Zachary, dies in her arms at birth, visual artist and author Alexis Marie Chute disappears into her “Year of Distraction.” She cannot paint or write or tap into the heart of who she used to be, mourning not only for Zachary, but also for the future they might have had together. It is only when Chute learns she is pregnant again that she sets out to find healing and rediscover her identity—just in time, she hopes, to welcome her next child.

In the forty weeks of her pregnancy, Chute grapples with her strained marriage, shaken faith, and medical diagnosis, with profound results.

Glowing with riveting and gorgeous prose, Expecting Sunshinechronicles the anticipation and anxiety of expecting a baby while still grieving for the child that came before—enveloping readers with insightful observations on grief and healing, life and death, and the incredible power of a mother’s love.

About the Author

Alexis Marie Chute is an award-winning artist, writer, and filmmaker. She received her Bachelor of Fine Arts in painting and photography from the University of Alberta, and her Masters of Fine Arts in creative writing from Lesley University in Cambridge, Massachusetts. Chute is a highly regarded public speaker and has traveled around the world presenting on art, writing, and the healing capacities of creativity. She is widely published in anthologies and magazines, and her artwork has been exhibited internationally. She lives in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada with her husband and their three living children.


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